Wednesday, April 25, 2007

The more things change, the more they stay the same.

Kinda like this post, but much more expensive.

Rescuers Pluck Man, Pet Bird From Tree
April 4, 2007

Texas - It took a Coast Guard helicopter to rescue a man and his pet cockatoo from the heights of a pine tree after he got stuck trying retrieve the $2,000 bird. William Hart, 35, had climbed about 60 feet up the tree to get the bird after it escaped from its cage and flew out a bedroom window. Television video showed him standing on a branch Tuesday evening awaiting rescue, the exotic white bird apparently tucked under his shirt.
The bird, Geronimo, got out after Hart's daughter apparently forgot to latch his cage after feeding him, Hart told the Houston Chronicle. He said he spotted Geronimo in flight and chased him, then climbed the tree until the cockatoo flew to his arm.
That's when Hart realized they were stuck. He said he yelled to his sister, who was helping him chase the bird, to call 911.
Firefighters had trouble backing a truck up to the tree because of the rain-saturated ground, so the Coast Guard helicopter was called in. The crew used a harness to get both man and bird down.
Hart had a few scratches and a bite on his finger from the frightened bird nipping him, but he said he was glad it all worked out. The shaking bird tucked its beak under his collar as he held it.
"He's my baby," Hart said. "I'd do it again."
Written by Associated Press

Saturday, April 21, 2007

State of the cat house

The girls are getting along pretty well, but Michaela always lets Lily know who's top cat.

P.S. Michaela has been De Crowned! (Does this mean she is no longer a princess or Queen?) She saw the vet for her checkup who said her bottom canines were "re absorbing" and were probably painful. So she was "decrowned". She had a bad week recovering from the surgery which meant 1ml of oral antibiotics twice a day. She kind of liked the pain killer, and got soft food (TJ Tuna) for a week. She's back to normal now and seems a bit happier, if clingy.
We knew she felt bad because Lily wasn't attacking her, wanting to play, and we knew when she was better when Lily went back on the offensive.

It's all over now, officially

I thought it was all over when they used Jimi Hendrix songs to sell cars, certainly it was another nail in the coffin when the Stones "Start Me Up" was used to sell Windows, (and how fitting with a line like "You make a grown man cry"), but THIS IS IT!!!!!

Warning, not for the sqeemish. (And no, I don't want to know how to post youtube videos)

Tuesday, April 17, 2007

Please Scroll Down!

Honestly, if I'd known I'd be getting all these visitors from a reference at Drunken Housewife, I'd have tried to put up something a little more interesting than altered dolls (not mine).

The poop stories are further down, cat pictures way at the beginning followed by fire dept prank stories. Frankly I'm out of gas here!

Actually my best work these days is in the comments sections at DH. (pretty pathetic huh?)

Here's picture of a Teapot "with attitude" by none other than Moonrabbit.

Sunday, April 15, 2007

Another Altered Doll- a work in progress

Fleeting enjoyment

We had dinner last night with 4 of the 8 people who attended the party in the last post. Moonrabbit mentioned the post, and only one person remembered the party or my telling jokes!

Thursday, April 12, 2007

The "highlight" of my social life

For a short while, there was a "thing" going around our social circle of having theme parties. Mercifully it seems to have died off, however before it did, we were invited to a party where we were to dress as characters from a fairy tale and do a presentation based on the story.

If it helps to visualize this, most of the people involved are, or were teachers.

Moonrabbit chose "The Fisherman's Wife" for us. I went online, and through the magic of Google, found a bunch of fishing jokes. I memorized a bunch of them, and figured out how to string them together as a standup routine. I was the surprize (and surprized) hit of the party!

I thought I had them together in a file, but all I could find were some of the ones I used and some of the rejects. Without further ado...

Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and
he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.

What Do Fish Say When They Hit a Concrete Wall?


Four married guys go fishing. After an hour, the following conversation took place. First guy: " You have no idea what I had to do to be able to come out fishing this weekend. I had to promise my wife that I will paint every room in the house next weekend." Second guy: " that's nothing, I had to promise my wife that I will build her a new deck for the pool." Third guy: " Man, you both have it easy! I had to promise my wife that I will remodel the kitchen for her." They continue to fish when they realized that the fourth guy has not said a word. So they asked him. You haven't said anything about what you had to do to be able to come fishing this weekend. " What's the deal?" Fourth guy: " I just set my alarm for 5:30 am. When it went off, I shut off my alarm, gave the wife a nudge and said, " Fishing or Sex" and she said, " Wear a Sweater."

Three blondes are sitting by the side of a river holding fishing poles with the lines in the water. A Game Warden comes up behind them, taps them on the shoulder and says, Excuse me, ladies, I'd like to see your fishing licenses.
We don't have any, replied the first blonde.
Well, if you're going to fish, you need fishing licenses. said the Game Warden.
But officer, replied the second blonde, we aren't fishing. We all have magnets at the end of our lines and we're collecting debris off the bottom of the river.
The Game Warden lifted up all the lines and, sure enough, there were horseshoe magnets tied on the end of each line. Well, I know of no law against it, said the Game Warden, take all the debris you want. And with that, the Game Warden left.
As soon as the Game Warden was out of sight, the three blondes started laughing hysterically. What a dumb Fish Cop, the second blonde said to the other two, doesn't he know that there are steelhead trout in this river?!

A man is out in his row boat when suddenly a passing speed boat raises huge waves and the man's oars fall overboard! He is stranded out in the middle of the lake!
After about two hours, he sees another row boat going by with a man and two women in it! The first man yells, "Hey buddy, can I borrow one of your oars?" The other man yells back,
"They're not whores ... they're my sisters!"

Every Sunday afternoon everyone in the neighborhood would meet at the nearby cross roads and country store to compare their weekend catches. Everyone had normal size fish except this one old farmer who had always brought in huge fish. The game warden heard about this and showed up one Sunday afternoon. After inspecting the old farmers fish, he turned to the farmer and said "If you don't show me your fishing spot , I'm going to have to close you down." The farmer replied by telling him to come out to the farm in the morning and he would take him fishing. The next morning the game warden shows up with his pole and the farmer tells him to climb onto the tractor. They head out into this big field until they come to a little pond. The warden is scratching his head because all he sees is a rotten old skiff, when he expected a large lake and something closer to a yacht. The farmer said to get in and they start rowing out to the middle. About this time the warden notices that there are no fishing poles. As he is about to say something, the farmer reaches into a box and pulls out a stick of dynamite, lights it and throws it into the pond. After the water and smoke settle, he paddles around picking up the fish. The warden's jaw is on the deck. He can't talk for a minute. When he finds his voice, he starts in on the farmer about how he can't believe what just happened and starts screaming to the farmer about all the regulations he has broken. While this is taking place the farmer calmly reaches into the box grabs another stick of dynamite, lights it, hands it to the warden and asks him if he is going to fish or talk.

A blonde wanted to go ice fishing, so after getting all of the right tools, she headed toward the nearest frozen lake. After getting comfy on her stool she started to cut a circular hole in the ice. Then from the heavens a voice boomed, ''THERE ARE NO FISH UNDER THE ICE.'' Startled, the blonde moved further down the ice, poured a thermos of hot chocolate and started to cut yet another hole in the ice. The voice boomed, ''THERE ARE NO FISH UNDER THE ICE.'' This time quite scared, the blonde moved to the far end of the ice. Then she started another hole and once again the voice said, ''THERE ARE NO FISH UNDER THE ICE.'' The very scared blonde raised her head and said, ''Is that you, Lord?'' The voice answered, ''NO. IT IS THE MANAGER OF THE ICE RINK.''

Wednesday, April 04, 2007

Altered Dolls-an art project

Moonrabbit and her many artsy friends have a current project called altered dolls. Each person starts with some form, and it is passed to each of the others, who add something to it. When everyone has worked on each doll, it comes back the to first person.

They have previously done this with altered books and altered boxes.

The handcrafted ceramic face and "hair" are Moonrabbits' additions to someone else's doll form.

Tuesday, April 03, 2007

What I got out of meditation and Yoga

Green has a post about Yoga which got me thinking about what I have gotten out of yoga and meditation.

Meditation came first, and eventually led to my being almost comfortable taking a VERY beginning yoga class.

In a word, meditation gave me Perspective.

As a journeyman perfectionist of long standing, I was, after much trying and reading, able to let go of the notion of "doing it right". I help this acceptance by thinking of it as "Practicing Meditation" rather than DOING it. It takes the pressure off, and reduces the negative self talk when I catch my mind wandering. I just begin again. It was by watching my thoughts intrude, welling up out of nowhere, and feeling my reactions to the thoughts that I realized that thoughts are only in my mind and are not REAL things. They come and go, and I can watch them or not. When emotions attach to the thoughts, I can chose to fully feel them, or let them pass by going back to concentrating on awareness of my breathing.

So rather than BEING an emotion now, I try to just FEEL the emotion. I am not perfect or consistent in my practice, and actually, I don't formally meditate much anymore unless I'm feeling stressed.

As for Yoga, I take a very beginning yoga class. I have learned to not overdo the poses most of the time. I have learned to let go of those poses that are impossible for me. I try to laugh inside thinking "yah right, what should I do while you're doing that?" I have learned to quiet my inner perfectionist most of the time. You're not supposed to compare yourself to others, but I usually look to see if anyone else's knees are next to their ears when sitting cross legged. I take a perverse pride in being the "worst" student. I figure that anyone else who's comparing can say "Well, I'm better than HIM."

I'm usually the only guy, and oldest person there. But I'm there.

I'm pushing for a "Geezer yoga" class.

The Guided meditation at the end of yoga is different than individual meditation where one can just concentrate on the breath.

To borrow from 12 step programs, "Take what you can use, and leave the rest"

Trivia answer

Since two out of the three people that read my blog have checked in, and the third should know the answer from listening to Moonrabbit and I talk about it...

The item is a Navajo water drum! Apparently made between 1920 and 1940, they were filled with water to various levels for different pitches then covered with hide. It is covered in pine pitch to make it waterproof.

The appraised value is $750.

This was an item in my step fathers collection that we are donating to a Native American museum. In the few notes we found, he thought it was a cooking pot.

Monday, April 02, 2007

Guess What?

This isn't a contest, there is nothing to win except bragging rights.

The challenge is this, identify, specifically, the item in the picture and it's professionally appraised valuation.