Wednesday, August 29, 2007

THE CURSE, or how I learned to give up hope

I just read this fine column at, and it reminded me of when I gave up hope and realized as the bumper sticker says, "I feel so much better since i gave up all hope."

It started as a quiet morning in the grocery store. It was a Lucky's grocery, a chain has been bought out several times, disappeared and is about to reappear!

I had only purchased a few items and as I approached the checkout, I observed that there were two clerks (one was the manager) and one customer. So, even though I know I have the THE CURSE, (wherein, no matter what line I get into it will be the longest) I foolishly thought to myself, "AH, I've got it made!"

As I put my items on the belt, I started picking up on the conversation between the one other customer and the exasperated clerk. She wanted to know why she couldn't get her can redemption money for her cans HERE because she had purchased them HERE! There was a redemption center in the parking lot which was not yet open, and signs for other nearby centers that WERE open. She wanted nothing to do with any of that, she wanted to talk to, wait for it, THE MANAGER (my checker) and proceded to argue with him for 10 minutes.

Thus I realized I was well and truly screwed. And the knowledge thereof I found to be freeing.

I now warn people behind me that I have THE CURSE, and that they get in line behind me at their peril. I have met a number of other souls like myself, and we smile and nod knowingly to each other while we hum "Amazing Grace" or "Ohm" or the Barney song to ourselves.

Serenity at last, great GOB a'mighty, serenity at last!

1 comment:

  1. Lucky's - oh the irony.

    I think I have a strain of that curse. Any time the Better Half and I need just one item and we are in hurry we seem to always find the person in front of us has WIC coupons. So I feel some of your pain.